Remember Jordan? Sorry, remember Katie Price? Oh, right, how could any of us forget; she’s only debasing our televisions every other day of the week. And if she’s not on the screen, she’s on the cover of those magazines they always put next to the queue in Tescos (and yes, I pick them up. I exclaim at what she’s wearing, so I’m just as bad as the rest of them. Judgement accomplished.).
Let’s move on to her most recent project. She’s done glamour model, she’s done angry reality TV personality, she’s done hideous nuptials with sleazy formerly famous pop singer (met through said reality TV show), she’s done divorce, famous wrestler, she’s done reality TV again…. What’s left? That’s right, folks: the pop career.
This above is a clip of Katie doing her (newest) thing on GMTV. Early in the morning. Take a gander. I’ll wait.
There are several things amiss with this…erm…display.
- Wet effect leggings.
If I wanted to see how you looked with tar all over your legs I could have called in a vote and had you dipped in a vat of the stuff either of the two times you decided to go onto that Celebrity Jungle show.
- Dancer’s bustier
Why only one dancer in a bustier? Is it in fact a stylish backbrace? Has lifting you above his head in show after show after awful show caused him physical injury? The emotional suffering was probably enough.
- The outfit.
The leggings I’ve dealt with. But the feathers and leopard print top (with no waist) and the massive heels and the studs on the half-hobo gloves? Yeeeesh.
- The miming.
Q. Is it so hard to move the microphone back before you hear yourself singing in the earpiece?
A. No.
- The barnet.
This, perhaps, is not in fact the fault of dear Katie. It is possible that a sudden accident backstage involving an electrocuted crow has left her unable to remove its body from atop her head. Bizarrely. We are awaiting clarification on this from GMTV.
Seriously though folks, applaud her tenacity in clawing her way back into the spotlight, time and time again?
Outraged that people like me are talking about her at all?
Shocked and appalled that someone like this is still famous, and more than willing to leave a comment to this effect, this perpetuating the vicious cycle?
Hmmm?
Alison Treacy
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